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Cluster fucked...

I need to get my shit together.. I have tons of things to get done and take care of and  my head is a mess. I re set my appointments and now I just have to make sure I am going to have a sitter for all the times I am going to need to be places.. That is the hard part. I don't seem to have any body with anytime to keep Lill for me anymore. I just need to get to some appointments. Damn and ever place I go said I have to have a sitter that I can't bring her with. I don't know why she isn't bad and pretty much just sits next to me. But I guess it's just an over all rule.. 

Well I worked Friday at this really cool club called Aquavor. Idk yet if I have to job but I am really hoping I do because I need to start working. I need to have money to spend and save and pay bills with. blah,, Being out of work for 2 months is along time and I am getting sick of it. I am only looking for like one night a week because school is starting and I am going back full time. I want a job that pays well and has benefits. A job I can be proud of for Lill,I want her to be able to look up to me. :)

I want to teach her to stand up for her self and to always be able to rely on herself over anyone else. And to always aim to do something she can be proud of but not to be afraid of failure because it is a chance to learn and grow. Idk I know I sound cheese right now, but I never had anyone working with me for me about me in anyway and I want Lill to know she is worth her hard work and anyone that will ever want to be in her life should be willing to but her first and work just as hard for her as she has. just saying.. 

So I have to make a few more appointments, School, FASFA, and some doc stuff. I also have to make sure I have time to get my storage cleared out soon.. ahhh.. That is going to be a mess.. and I am not looking forward to it.. I would say it is two days work to empty it. But it'll be more then that to go through it all.. The next weekend I don't have Lill that is what I am doing. I should have done it this past weekend but I didn't so whatever...

 
Late

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October 2012

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